“Words are our weapons,” a battalion commander told his staff at an exercise last winter. It’s true – officers deal mostly with words, and without skillful writing, an officer is about as useful as an infantry team leader who can’t shoot straight. Thus my dismay when one of the officers here asked me to proofread this ball of mush:
JFHQ is leveraging the expertise of its individuals as organizations through
Knowledge Management. The insights and experience of the organization are
represented, distributed, and adopted throughout the entire organization.
This process will be identified and published to enable the subordinate
organizations to benefit from relevant insights and ideas that support the
organizations strategic and individual action plans. Managing this
intellectual capital and intellectual assets will aid in the development and
provisioning to achieve shorter product/service development cycle while
maintaining high standards of quality.
As far as I can tell, the paragraph above doesn’t actually say anything – it’s textbook bureaucrat-ese. I chopped it down and tried to tactfully say that it was “a little dense” and that I tried to “revise for clarity.” I would’ve rather put a big red X through the whole thing and said “do it over!,” but…